Archana Singh

 

I was in a constant state of anger and panic, even when I was laughing with friends. There was always this seemingly irrational fear harassing my every move. I wouldn't sleep for 3-4 days straight. Often I would end up in places with no recollection of how I got there. What I had (and still have) is PTSD. What I didn't have then was my voice. I didn't know how to explain to someone what was happening. I couldn't tell myself what I was experiencing was not crazy, or what I was even feeling. What I learned not long ago is that underneath anger is usually fear and pain. I was hurt, not broken. It's taken years to heal, and I continue to every day. It's ironic though, I didn't think people within my community would understand. But I gained a voice and now I can hear theirs too.

© 2020 by MannMukti

MannMukti pledges to serve all South Asians, recognizing the power hierarchies in our communities, created and maintained by different identities of caste, language, geography, gender, sexuality, and religion that shape individuals' obstacles while seeking mental liberation.